And So It Goes

Still alive and kickin'. By way of update, after a very dramatic several weeks and hundreds of desperate emails, it seems my housing in Moscow is worked out. More on that later . . .

As finals approach and deadlines for big decisions arrive, I'm finding that there aren't enough hours in the day. I try to cheat by multi-tasking every second. As I type now, I'm doing laundry, practicing my yoga, knitting sweaters for Siberians, teaching Cambodian to Colombians, and reading half a page out of Crime and Punishment which I started reading in June 2006 (I'm on pace to have it done November 2017). Well I wish I was that productive anyway.

Instead, my laundry is piling up, forcing me to wear my "I volunteer at headstart! What about you?" t-shirt, which is an absolute lie as I failed miserably to continue to attend just a few days after the program issued the clothing. My Sunday school lessons don't quite get planned by Sunday School. My books don't quite get read by class-time. And my friends and family don't quite get their phone calls returned in time for them to be relevant.

On Monday I got up early. Ate a Fiber One bar and an orange. Tried desperately to catch up on my reading before an early class. Didn't quite make it. Got a disappointing email; time to house-hunt in Moscow again. Got called on in class. Fudged through an answer. Went to Criminal Law. Learned about domestic abuse. Sent 10 emails to people on the other side of the world. Got out of Criminal Law. Tried desperately to catch up on my reading before afternoon classes. Didn't quite make it. Passed up on a Diet Coke on the way to Contracts (too many lately). Ate another orange and a sandwich. Learned about contracts. Got out of class. Went to Elements of the Law. Stared blankly for one hour and fifteen minutes. Got out of class. Bewildered. Found solace back at my carrel in a bag of Swedish Fish. An entire bag. Started reading. Then a meeting. Then more reading. Time for that Diet Coke; I made it until 5:00. Not so bad. Then another meeting. Group study. Arguments. Frantic struggle to find organization. More reading. Darn, it's 8:30; I was going to go workout at 7:00. The gym bag I packed last Thursday will stay in my car a little longer. More reading. Outlining. Trying to keep up with 147 of the smartest people I've ever known. Time to go home. Wondered if the grocery store was still open at 11:30. The thought of grocery shopping made me queasy. Decided not to check. Too bad as I think I ate my last two oranges. Read my scriptures. Checked my email. Nothing yet. Climbed into bed, trying not to think about the day. Sleep is necessary and the next one starts again in less than five hours. Four now; relax; need sleep. Now three. Fall asleep you idiot! A little panicking. Heart racing a bit. Finally fast asleep. Two hours later the alarm went off. Tuesday had begun. More of the same on Tuesday. Repeat on Wednesday. Repeat on Thursday but add a few hours at the bank (some of my last). Repeat. Repeat again on Saturday but subtract classes and add General Conference. Sunday; a day of rest, and now, blogging.

And tomorrow we start again. Thank heavens it isn't always like this.

Most days at school are a chain of frustration and discouragement. Feeling lost and behind. Often feeling a little dumb. And then every once in a while there are tiny break-throughs, which thankfully are just good enough and just often enough to make me absolutely love what I'm doing; frustration and all.

~It Just Gets Stranger