I discovered shortly after arriving that Daniel is about as good at diving as the the Queen of Colors is at loving others (which is not good, in case you're new). We swim out to a floating dock and hang out there frequently. One evening I told Daniel I thought we should practice diving off of said dock. Daniel then ran to the edge to dive and that's when I discovered that he had a problem. And the really shocking part was, he didn't know he had a problem.
Daniel was convinced that since he put his hands together in the praying position while jumping into the water feet first, he was, in fact diving. Several arguments later I finally decided to shoot a video of his version of "diving head first" so he could see for himself that he, in fact, was NOT diving head first. Once all parties agreed upon this, Daniel applied and was eventually admitted into the Eli McCann School of Diving, which lasted for three days before there were any positive results.
And so, to give you a nice way to enjoy your snowy weekend (if you're in Salt Lake today), I give you three short videos of our progress. The first video is the one I discussed above, the second is another terrible attempt at diving, and the third was shot shortly after graduation.
Any ideas on what tricks we should teach him next?
~It Just Gets Stranger
Daniel, that last dive was excellent!
ReplyDeleteI really shouldn't laugh because I cannot dive either. At all. It just isn't possible. If I even tried, it would look much like your first dive. I never thought of it being my brain trying to protect my face but that's a pretty good theory. I also don't stand under the shower with water running in my face. That's just crazy and seems like a good way to drown.
Don't they make some kind of shower cap for your face?
Delete'I'm afraid I might hit a shark'. No, Daniel. You should be afraid the shark is going to hit you. With mouth open.
ReplyDelete(I'm sure that will be helpful, right?)
His fear of hitting a shark is actually one of his more rational fears. So I'm encouraging it.
DeleteIf Daniel was to hit a shark while diving, and live to tell the story i would give him kudos.
DeleteOh my gosh, everything about those videos was just awesome. The hesitation, the shark fear, I am rolling with laughter!
ReplyDeleteI just spit tea on my screen again. Stop it.
ReplyDelete~Jax
I can understand wanting to protect your face when you're as beautiful a man as Daniel. I'd like to see an armstand back double tuck for starters. And then move on to the ever popular back double somersault with one and a half twists in the free position. And a scoring system.
ReplyDeleteOk "anonymous" (aka probably Daniel).
DeleteThat sounds like a good nickname: "Probably Daniel."
DeleteHonestly, I think a LOT of the "Anonymous" comments are from Eli himself... or his close friends.. either that or someone very creepy has a serious crush on Daniel and Eli.
DeleteI...I didn't even know it was possible for someone not to know how to dive. Well, I guess you learn something new everyday.
ReplyDeleteThese videos are awesome. :) Daniel - you almost had it there on that last one - just a little more rotation! I want to come visit you guys! -Elsa
ReplyDeleteWhen I first read the blog title, and even the first paragraph, I thought it said, "The Eli McCann School of Driving" and I was reading it thinking to myself, "When is he going to start talking about cars...?" until the second paragraph, when you started talking about driving off the dock and I got seriously concerned...
ReplyDeleteNo, honey. I need to attend a driving school myself. One that helps me stop hunching forward like an old man and complaining about how fast all the cars are going every time I get behind the wheel.
DeleteI want to see Daniel do a Triple Lindy. But you'll have to construct a dive tower and get some springboards first. But I am certain he training footage would be well worth any costs this might incur.
ReplyDeleteNever would there be a more entertaining video than one of Daniel attempting to do a triple anything off of a dive tower.
DeleteIs there a shark fin on the horizon in video three? Just sayin'...
ReplyDeleteThis is awesome! I found myself cheering Daniel on "You got this, you can do it Daniel!"
ReplyDeleteFetching the paper's always a good trick to learn. And if you could house-train him he'll make someone a really good pet.
ReplyDeleteYou DID mean those sorts of tricks?
haha best dive ever!!!! hahaha
ReplyDeleteO.m.g. I could watch that first dive every day...and crack up every. Single. Time. In fact, I'm going to test that theory and watch it again.....yup! Still funny! Daniel is an awesomely good sport, and the last dive was pretty good. (hee, went back again, STILL funny!) May you have many more happy, shark-free dives in your future. :)
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a child at swimming lessons (which were traumatizing enough as it was), the instructors would make me kneel on the diving platform, lean over the water, and then they would grab my ankles and throw me in headfirst. Needless to say, I did NOT learn to dive from this experience. I am good at flopping in, however.
ReplyDeleteGo, Daniel, Go! No really, go. Enough waiting already. Go! Ga-O! Ga-ooooh!
ReplyDeleteHmmmm did you have your phone in a plastic baggie when you swan out to the dock?? Yes, I am just catching up on older blogs!
ReplyDelete