Last year I told you about a service opportunity linked to The World Food Program wherein my family participated in a challenge proposed by Pioneers of Peace (FB link here) to take the month of November to collect household change into cups. Throughout November each year, my siblings, nieces, nephews, Bob and Cathie, Tami, etc., drop change wherever found into red cups. We then count the change on Thanksgiving and donate whatever we've collected through this link.
We are surprised each year to cap out at somewhere over $100, which is a meaningful donation to an organization that purports to be able to provide meals for impoverished children for only 25 cents a piece. Apart from helping starving children, it has been a wonderful and tangible opportunity for the kids in my family to participate in a service opportunity, one that we have seen help them gain a powerful perspective on selflessness.
Last year several Strangers participated in the program in November and left comments with Pioneers of Peace, sharing their families' experiences. I was grateful, as I frequently am, for the incredible community we have here of Strangers helping Strangers, wherever they may be.
Cathie is assisting Pioneers of Peace in their efforts this year and she asked that I invite y'all to participate again this year. And I do so gladly. Please check out the links and consider this great and simple opportunity for your families, workplaces, local massage parlors, bowling alleys, etc. And as always, we will love to hear about your experiences if you do decide to participate.
I am fortunate that a large part of my job involves helping children in dire circumstances find safety and hope. Through my job, I've had an opportunity to interact with wonderful organizations and individuals throughout the country that expend every ounce of effort they have to provide resources in some of the worst situations imaginable. I have seen firsthand how community efforts, no matter how small, can make a world of difference for a child who is hungry, neglected, abused, or simply a member of a desperate family that is struggling to overcome insurmountable obstacles. I thank you in advance for your consideration.
And since it is now November (WHAT THE CRAP WE ARE GETTING OLD) it is time to kick off one of my favorite Stranger traditions. In the comments, please share your own story of a time a stranger helped you (or you were able to help a stranger). Let's make it really dusty in here.
~It Just Gets Stranger
I don't know about "massage parlor" but I'll gladly place a cup in my private massage practice, as well as one in the shop at my day job, and I'll pass the hat at our weekly horror film get togethers.
ReplyDeleteNow I just have to remember to add RED SOLO CUPS to my shopping list tonight.
DeleteThis is so great! Thank you! Thank you! And RED solo cups work wonderfully well!
DeleteCathie. XOXO
Honestly, I was going to say the same thing. I realize that it NOT the point of this very well-intentioned article, but can we please stop calling them massage parlors? Or calling licensed massage therapists "masseuses"? I'm an LMT and the only way we're going to move past the taboo of massage is to legitimize the terminology we use so others will recognize it for the professional health and medical service that it is. Not blasting you in any way, Eli, but it's disheartening to read things like this when it's hard enough to get other healthcare providers to acknowledge us in the health care field as it is.
DeleteThat being said, I am certainly glad to help out as well and already have a full jar of change at home ready to donate!
In Eli's defense, he had just come back from an isolated island where they are in fact called massage parlors with masseuses. Linguistics does take time to get reset. Just look at Madonna, she had that affected accent that somehow got unstuck with her divorce.
DeleteAs an LMT I agree Alana, I always cringe when I get called masseuse or my practice called a "massage parlor". Even jokingly it still feels dodgy, unless it's LMTs joking together. I think it's a classic case of "no on picks on my little brother but me".
DeleteThanks for the great idea!
ReplyDeleteAnd I'll go first! In May our basement flooded. My husband was out of town on business and I was home with the three kids, two of whom were sick at the time. I called my next door neighbor in tears to ask if she could help watch my kids while I dealt with the problem. Within an hour four different neighbors (two of whom I hardly knew) were in my basement helping me drain the water and dry carpets and furniture. They were my angels and I will never forget how they stepped in for us.
I have one! I was at the doctor, 8 months pregnant, with an ear infection. And realized I didn't have the right card to pay, couldn't reach my husband despite multiple phone calls. When I got done with my appointment, the front desk lady said the copay was 'taken care of'. I'm very sure another patient that overheard me freaking out paid for it. Forever grateful.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was driving home from college on rain-slick interstate highway pavement and rolled her car over on the side of the road. Thankfully she did not hit anyone else and she wasn't badly hurt. Four other cars immediately stopped to help. Her car was upside down and one man helped free her from the seat belt and climb out the rear window which was smashed out. A couple went around and picked up her belongings that had been thrown from the car. Three guys in a pickup on their way home from work combed through underbrush by the fence to find more of her things. The other person called 911 and stayed with her for a bit. The guys in the pickup said they'd stay until emergency help arrived. Then, when the police showed up, everyone just got in their vehicles and went on their way. We'll never know who those angels were, but they appeared when desperately needed, provided support and assistance as best each of them could, then melted away when official help arrived, asking for nothing more than the opportunity to help a stranger in need. Bless them all!!
ReplyDeleteThis sounds exaclty like something that happened a few yrs ago during a Thanksgiving roadtrip from Cali to Arizona.
DeleteMy bro-in-law pulled a girl out of her over turned SUV, that skid and tumbled in the pooring rain on the interstate -right in front of us. It happened so fast and it looked horrible! He pulled our car over as soon as she stopped rolling, and ran into the pooring rain. I will never forget the silhouette, of him standing on top of that turned over SUV as rain relentlessly poored, which flashed in and out of the darkness as the passing cars' lights shined on him. He pulled her out checked if she was ok, and ran back to our car and we drove away. She had lots of help by then and he saw sirens were coming. We still had 4hrs to our destination, and he drove them soaking wet and freezing. I am so blessed that my son has an uncle like him. My son's father died when he was 1yr old, so it is amazing he has a role model like my bro-in-law.
Perfect timing, I've been cleaning my house and finding loose change EVERYWHERE and keep thinking, there has got to be something useful to do with this.
ReplyDeleteThe most poignant stranger-help story I have could have been an attempt on my life but hey, I'm still alive and I guess it worked out! I was 18 and had just moved to Oahu to attend BYU-Hawaii. Been there for literally one day. I woke up late and missed the bus that was taking new students on a tour of the island, but I had a friend on the tour who let me know where they were. I felt confident in my public transportation skills so I attempted to meet up with the group. That plan failed, miserably. I ended up in a strange part of Honolulu where the bus didn't come very often, my cell phone died, I didn't have a watch....all I knew was that sometime within 3 hours, a bus should be coming to the stop I was stuck waiting at, and it should theoretically take me in the right direction. So I sat on a bench by the side of a busy road, kind of terrified, praying that I would make it home that night. After a little while, a random guy in a convertible pulls over and asks if I need a ride. Part of me is like "THIS IS HOW HORROR STORIES START JUST SAY NO!'nn" but another part of me felt that this was an answer to prayer. After establishing that he would drop me off at a well-known bus stop to catch the correct bus, and noticing that it was a convertible and I could theoretically jump out anytime I wanted to, I got into the car. He ended up being a super nice guy, who grew up close to my hometown in Missouri (and let me tell you, you don't meet MO natives all that frequently. Haha). He told me that the bus stop where he picked me up was territory of a Samoan gang known for violence against white people...which made me more grateful for his kindness than I already was. He dropped me off at the bus stop without incident and I got home just fine. Though I did avoid ever taking that particular bus route ever again. Haha! I have no idea what moved him to pick up a skinny terrified white girl from the side of the road but I am forever grateful. Being lost in a strange city with no means of communication was more frightening than I imagined it could be.
Last year, I read your change cup story. Right after that, my then 9 yr old son came gome from Sunday School and announces that he wanted to go to heaven someday. And he thought he should help people, to make getting there easier. He told me he wanted to help hungry people. I told him about your change cup story, and he thought it sounded lime a good idea, but he wanted to help local hungry people. For the entire month, he dug for change, looked for change, found change, returned cans, asked the entire family for change and even watched the sidewalks for change.
ReplyDeleteHe filled an entire quart mason jar, all on his own. And then presented it to the local food pantry. The elderly lady who ran it at the time was incredibly touched (as was I!). She said they had never had a young child just decide to do such a thing before.
Thanks for your change cup story last year! I think it helped my kid get closer to heaven, and, hopefully a few local families!
Thank you for sharing this.
DeleteParenting win.
DeleteI love this. Thank you so much for sharing this! You are right...it is a parenting win!
DeleteLittle people can have such big hearts!
Cathie XOXO
I can't begin to tell you all the things people have done for me. I became a single mom 6 years ago and the things that has been done for me is an endless list. From meals dropped off at my house to fixing my car to free babysitters. I've been given a lot.
ReplyDeleteA few years ago, to pay it forward, I felt I should give some of my tax return (as a single mom, homeowner, college student, working full time I got more back than I ever deserved) to another single mom friend of mine. She had been saving for a down payment on a house for YEARS. She lived in a cramped apartment in a really bad neighborhood. She found a few houses she liked, but was always a thousand or so short for a down payment. A thousand would take her at least another year or two to save up and she was very discouraged. So when I got my tax return, I gave her a check for a thousand dollars. Honestly, It hurt me financially. I needed it and could've used it a hundred different ways. But so much had been done for me, how could I not give it to her? She was able to buy a small house for her and her son. It has been so exciting to watch her blossom in her new house.
Fast forward a few years to last year. I found myself in a similar situation. Desperate for a place to live. Then my church family stepped up. I had only been attending there a few months but they knew of my housing problem. They bought an older house and completely remodeled it. Then they gave me a personal loan to pay back what they paid for the original purchase (remodel job was 100% donated). So now I live in a beautiful home that is valued at double what I owe, helping me rebuild my credit, and give my three children a stable home.
God took that $1000 I gave away and multiplied it times 10 and provided two homes for two families.
I was a single mama for 7 years. I've lost count of the ways that people reached out and helped me when the going got tough. Now that I am married and my little guy is 16 years old, I have been using my day off every week to help a young mother out. One mom I reached out to list her husband to cancer 2 years ago. She had twin 4yo boys and a 2yo girl. I spend one day a month hanging with them for 6-8 hours so mom can shop/eat/pee in peace. Next week it's a friend who home schools and sees a lot of the inside of her home. I will watch the kids and she is going to have adult conversation with friends-yay! People say I'm giving these moms a gift, but the reality is I feel blessed to spend my time with these little humans. They make me see the world with fresh eyes and a lighter heart.
ReplyDeleteWhen we were married for just over a year, my husband fell off our roof and shattered his ankle. We had our 2 y/o son from his first marriage, a 9 month old baby, and he was self employed. We were less than dirt poor, and had no health insurance. With his injury, he was unable to work- he was a 1 man construction company at the time. This was in November. Before this, we spent many an evening walking through wal mart and its parking lot looking for loose change with which we could buy a gallon of milk for our son. We weren't even remotely concerned about Christmas being right around the corner, as our kids were too young to care. 2 weeks before Christmas, though, strangers started a 12 days of Christmas for our family wherein we received food and toys, and I sobbed every night for this magical gift to our new family! I never thought I could be more thankful for anything. On Christmas morning, after a knock at the door, I opened it to find a pile of wrapped presents bigger than our car- brand new suits forand tools for my husband, clothes and toys for the kids, you name it- it was all there and without a single name on any "from" tag. That was 6 years ago, and for the last 3 years we've been well on our own two feet. We collect change through out the year and spend it on a 12 days of Christmas for a family in need, because of that Christlike expression of compassion some strangers shared with us.
ReplyDeleteIt was 30 yrs. ago (yes, I'm THAT old), and we were struggling financially. I drove an old car that stalled every time it rained. I was leaving my part time job to pick up my 5-yr. old daughter from school when the skies opened, a cold rain began to fall, and "old yeller" stalled in the middle of a very busy street.
ReplyDeleteThe flashers didn't work, so I sat there a moment wondering how I was going to make it the 10 miles to the house much less how I'd pay for a tow and repairs..all while hoping I didn't get rear-ended. I got out, in the pouring rain, and watched as car after car honked at my still vehicle blocking their way or sped quickly past me in the other lane.
This was in a time before cell phones, so I knew my options were...well, walk or walk. I had to get to my daughter. She'd be frightened if I wasn't there to pick her up.
I started walking, and the more I walked the more I shivered. I was soaked to the skin and cold to the bone.
Then, a car pulled up beside me and the passenger window came down. I instinctively leaned towards the warm, dry interior of the car. It was a man, about my age, and as he smiled at me my first thought was "holy shit, this is how abductions happen and I'm going to be on the 6 o'clock news."
"Do you want a ride?" he asked.
I looked at the street, and knew I had at least 8 miles to go and school let out in less than 30 minutes. I wouldn't make it in time.
"I need to get to my daughter in (my town)", I replied
"I can take you there. I live in (my town), too."
It was still little comfort, but I was shivering uncontrollably now so I took a leap of faith.
He looked nice enough. Business suit, nice shoes, new car, heat..blessed heat.
Yes, I thought to myself, and Ted Bundy was a hottie, too.
I got in, and one hand on the door handle, sidled as far away from him as I could get on his car's front bench seat.
"What were you doing out there?" He asked, trying to make me relax with friendly conversation.
"My car broke down." I said, not making eye contact.
"Look, my wife is your age and I wouldn't want her walking in the rain either." He smiled as I tentatively glanced his way.
"Thank you," I said, "it's really kind of you."
"And I know you're frightened," he began and I thought 'oh shit, here it comes', "but, you don't need to be. I'm on my way home to have lunch with my wife and 2-yr. old son. I work right over there." he said, pointing to a large office building. "Here..", he said, pulling out his wallet, "take a look at the picture of him right here, and there's my driver's license"
I relaxed, feeling somewhat foolish, this man was truly kind and just wanted to help.
A few minutes later he dropped me in front of the school and I got my daughter. We lived less than half a block from there, so we walked home.
That night, the hubby and I went back to where my car had stalled. The rain had stopped some time ago.
Someone had pushed it to the shoulder of the road. I got it and she fired right up.
I've never forgotten that man and his kindness, and try to pay it forward whenever I can.
You are a fantastic story teller! I mean that sincerely, not sarcastically. What a humbling memory.
DeleteKina, she has a pretty fun blog you should check out for more of this.
DeleteWait, you have a blog?!? I am so reading your blog now.
DeleteAww...shucks, y'all. Thank you. *blushing*
DeleteEli - really, dude, thanks for the plug.
EVERYONE ELSE - click on my avatar and go read my blog.
Do it. Do it NOW. Don't make me have to use my mom voice on you.
...aaaaaaaaand, by 'avatar', I of course meant 'name'.
DeleteYour blog hates me and won't let me post.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteOk, didn't realize I needed awesomesauciness to approve me. I AM NOW AWESOMESAUCINESS APPROVED!
DeleteThis past summer my wife and I along with our newborn baby and 1 year old daughter stopped at a Wal-Mart late one night to pick up a few needed things. When we got back in the car and began the drive home but our car wasn't running well. I thought if I put some more gas in it, maybe it would run better. I pulled over, ran to a nearby station and bought a gas can and put some gas in it. I went back to the car to put the gas in it but t turned out to be a lot more difficult than I thought it would be and took way longer than it should have. By the time that was done, the battery had died and I couldn't get the car started. By this time it was getting quite late and the babies were getting fussy. A few people had offered to help but didn't have jumper cables. A policeman showed up since our car was stuck on the side of the road, but he said he wasn't allowed to jump our car. We had attempted to put the car in neutral so we could push the car into a nearby parking lot, but since the battery was dead we weren't even able to get it into neutral. Finally a younger man and woman came asking if they could help. We told them we needed a jump. They said they didn't have jumper cables but told me they would go buy some and come back. After a few minutes they returned, jumper cables in hand. We were able to jump the car and they helped us push it into a nearby parking lot. They quickly left, not waiting for any thanks from us. I am so grateful for their kindness and willingness to go out of their way to help a family in a stressful situation.
ReplyDeleteThis spring, my husband was very ill and I was nearly dead from sleep-deprivation thanks to my fantastically fat baby (we're talking three hours of sleep every night). My husband ended up in the hospital, bleeding out for unknown reasons. It was three days of blood transfusions, scopes, tests, and fear before the problem was miraculously discovered and he underwent surgery to fix the problem. In the meantime, I was losing my mind with two kids and dog and household to run. My older brother was an angel and probably spent more time in the hospital than I did so my husband was rarely ever alone. One of our oldest friends spent two nights sleeping in the hospital so I could be home with the kids. My SIL/BIL took my daughter for a weekend of fun adventures with cousins so I only had to worry about the baby when my husband finally came home to recover. Neighbors and dear friends took the baby during the day so I could spend as many hours as possible at the hospital. People brought food to my house, offered to do my laundry, and basically just supported me when I was afraid my husband would die.
ReplyDeleteI still tear up about it, thinking of all the help I received in such a tumultuous time. Rarely did I ever have to ask for anything; it was just given.
When I was in 8th grade I had to stay late for play practice (or something, can't quite remember). Back in those days (2004or5) I didn't have a cell phone, the front office had been closed, and I didn't have change to find a payphone. My mom didn't know what time I needed to be picked up, but I couldn't remain at the school any longer so I decided I would try to walk the 2.7 miles home. It was snowing and all I'd worn was a light sweatshirt and a pair of cheap Candy's shoes to school. All the sidewalks were feet deep under snow so I had to walk on the 'shoulder' of the road which was pretty minimal in the winter. As cars passed I'd get sprayed with snow and ice and I was shivering to the bone.
ReplyDeleteI knew it was risky, but I was so cold after about 1.5 miles, that I decided to stop at a random house and ask if I could just use their phone to call my mom. The house I chose had lots of lit Christmas decorations out so I hoped it was safe enough and that they would be kind.
An elderly man answered and he was alone with his little dog. I was so terrified and didn't want to go in, but knew that I didn't have many options at that point. I asked if I could just use his phone to quickly call my mom for a ride and he agreed and showed me the phone and had me sit down in his living room.
After calling to let my mom know where I was I played with his dog on the edge of my seat ready to fight or run, which ever was necessary, if he were to approach me.
He left me alone and my mom called to let me know she was there. I thanked him and gratefully left his house.
Since then I've tried several times to find his house again. It was right on a main road and it seemed pretty obvious at the time. I've yet to find it again, and though this may not be true, I really feel that he was an angel sent to help me in my time of need.
I have to agree with you, Morgan. If you never were able to find the house again, he must have been an angel only visible to you and your mom On. That. Day.
DeleteI live in suburban Minneapolis, and this time of year it's pretty common to have some cold, rainy days. Two weeks or so ago was one of those days. I was driving home from a quick grocery run before my kids were done with school. I noticed an old man trudging down the wet sidewalk with a wonky, half-broken umbrella and a good sized bag. I thought it was a bit unusual to see someone waking along that road, and I felt bad for the guy on such a chilly, dreary day.
ReplyDeleteI turned around and backtracked to the nearest parking lot, hopped out of my car, and asked him if I could give him a ride to wherever he was going. The first words out of his mouth were, "You're a Christian just like me, aren't you." It was a statement, not a question. I am, and so that was a little common ground.
Turns out, he needed a ride to a spot about 3 miles away, so off we went. He told me his name was Bill. He said, "I'm going to tell you about me. These are things I've told a lot of people, so I'll say them fast. I'll leave out some details, but we have enough time for me to tell you some things."
He left me with three gems out of his rapid-fire story telling:
1. After lots of years working at KFC, he knows for sure that "God is more important than money."
2. Back in the 70s, he had been drinking and snowmobiling (fast) late one night with a friend, and he cut his engine for no apparent reason. He looked ahead in the light from his snowmobile headlight and saw a barbed wire fence three feet in front of him. "It would have chopped my head off," he said,"so I know God saved my life."
3. As I dropped him off at his destination, he smiled and said, "You did this nice thing for me and I hope God does something nice for you."
My point in sharing this is simply that connecting with kindness is a thing of beauty for both the receiver and the giver. We just need to keep our eyes open for small, everyday opportunities.
"Inasmuch as you do these things for one of them, you do them for Me." Or something like that. I don't have my Bible memorized, like some of you Strangers out there probably do. I'm happy to be corrected, or the reference cited.
DeleteSeveral years ago, I agreed to be bumped on an oversold flight after the airline GUARNETEED that I would be placed on the next flight out. It was Thanksgiving, so I really wanted to get to my aunt's house for the holiday and see my siblings and extended family. Fast forward to the next flight: the attendant at the desk explained that I was in fact NOT guaranteed a spot on the flight, but I was on the stand-by list of the already overbooked flight. This lead to some embarrassing public tears when I found out there would be no room for me on the plane. A woman came up to me and said she would let me take her spot on the plane and arranged it with the desk. It makes me tear up thinking about it still, and it happened over 10 years ago.
ReplyDeleteOne morning my first year in college I stopped at a convenient store on the way to school (it was a 30 minute drive one way) like I did every morning. I picked up a package of donuts and drink and went to pay and my card didn't work, I knew full and well that there was money in the account, but after running it both debit and credit the person behind the counter said it wouldn't work. So I turned around to put the items back and the lady behind me offered to pay, of course I told her it really wasn't that important and proceeded to put the items away. She met me at the door as I was leaving and told me to go get my items back and that it was taken care of, I looked at the guy behind the counter (for reassurance, obviously) and he nodded for me to go get my things. I was a whopping $3 or $4, really not much at all. That lady didn't know me from Adam, I couldn't point her out in a crowd today if I wanted to... but her tiny act of kindness has stuck with me since. I don't know that she realized how much that meant to me and how it would impact me to still practice kindness almost 10 years later. You never know how much a simple kind act can brighten a person's day.
ReplyDeleteI have an Eli story-
ReplyDeleteI hadn't known him for very long but he made me feel like family almost right away because that's how he is with everyone. I had gotten really sick and was working a million hours and going to school and I was about to have a nervous breakdown. Eli showed up at my house one evening with an entire week's worth of meals he had made and put in Tupperware labeled with the days of the week and barf-worthy cheesy inspirational sayings. It was the weirdest and sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I never told him this but I cried after he left and will never forget it. The care tasted better than the food (and the food was pretty good).
I had a 1 year old and 2 month old baby, and had just moved to a new place, halfway across the country from my family. I didn't know more than a handful of people in the entire state (entire area of the country!). One day, I noticed strange bruises on my little baby's legs, and so I took him to the doctor to find out what was going on. Instead of helping my find out what caused the bruises, the doctor reported me to CPS and recommended that my kids be placed in foster care. The case worker who arrived at the doctor's office told me she could take my kids, or I could have them stay with family friends. We had no family friends, having just moved there, but I called the one person in the entire state whose number I had: my visiting teacher from church. I was humiliated to explain the reason I needed her help, thinking she would judge me, a person she barely knew, as an unstable and abusive mother. But instead she welcomed my tiny kids into her house and family, and cared for them, and for me, for several days while we worked through what turned out to be a bleeding issue for my baby. That experience inspires me all the time to be a true friend, like she was to me.
ReplyDeleteThis is a wild story! I'm so glad she was able to help you, and so glad it only took a few days to sort things out. What a nightmare.
DeleteTwo Elis one cup
ReplyDeleteThis was a pretty small thing, but it's something I've never forgotten. Back when I was in the seventh grade, I was pretty shy. Seventh grade was hard for me (who isn't it hard for?) but I think the bus ride to and from school was especially hard because I didn't really have any friends on my bus route. My stop was one of the first picked up and one of the last dropped off, so it was a pretty long ride - probably close to 30 minutes. One day I was sitting by myself, as per usual, when a girl I didn't really know asked if she could sit by me. She was a couple years older than me and really nice and outgoing. She introduced herself, and asked me my name and just general chit-chat. We talked until she got to her stop and that was it. It wasn't a big thing, but it meant a lot to that lonely 12-year-old girl.
ReplyDeleteSeriously middle school was the worst, that girl is an angel.
DeleteI have two stories. The first: my 5 month old baby lost a sock in the store and while I was looking for it, a woman stopped me to ask if I knew his foot was bare. I wasn't really rude but I was a little short tempered in telling her that I knew and was looking for it. Well, after another 30 minutes of wandering up and down every isle with my three kids (4 years old and under) I ran into this lady again. She had been looking for me because she had bought me a 6-pack of little baby socks. It was a little thing, but it was so touching. The second: a couple of years ago my sister was riding her bicycle and was run off the road by an SUV. She went over into a drainage ditch and smashed her face pretty badly. Several people stopped to help her, but there was one woman who didn't speak a word of English, who sat beside her for 20 minutes waiting for an ambulance, holding her hand and wiping blood off her face and speaking reassuringly to her, even though this woman knew my sister couldn't understand her, she didn't want my sister to feel alone. Even the littlest things can make a world of difference.
ReplyDelete