I know that there's some way to do what the kids are calling "the scanning" and I could post this picture without the reflection of myself taking a picture of the picture with my what the kids are calling "the iphone." But I don't know how to do any of that. Also, this isn't one of those blogs you go to to see good photography. Or to learn things. Or to join a cause.
I seriously don't know what you people come here for.
Wait, I think I had a point. I did. That point is this: I constantly post stuff on Stranger about how Bob and Cathie destroyed my childhood by terrifying me throughout it through their special custom-made subjugation and the infliction of inhumane pranks and teasing. And I frequently poke fun at Bob and Cathie on Stranger and make them seem like cartoon characters. But I hope they know that I actually think the world of them. Even if the female half of them used to drag me out of church by the ear every single Sunday and the male half of them once made me drink half a gallon of milk in one sitting, telling me that I had accidentally swallowed poison and this was the only cure.
I like you guys, Bob and Cathie. This picture is extra proof that there's no way you're in your 60s. Not in body, or spirit.
And I'm not just saying that because you were the first ones to correctly diagnose my ringworm.
~It Just Gets Stranger
Cathie is a beautiful woman. And I don't know what I come here for, either. Sometimes your posts entertain me. Sometimes I feel like you are a bit too full of yourself, especially after having met you. And you know what? I don't even know why. But I wish you the best.
ReplyDeleteIT'S OKAY, ELI! I ALSO THINK I AM THE BEST! ALL CAPPPPPS!!!
DeleteFor the record, Eli is not full of himself. I'm getting a little tired of the Eli bashing that sometimes happens around here.
DeleteBashing is something very different. I don't see any disrespect in the above post. It's the impression that someone got from him. Which doesn't mean is true. I personally don't have that opinion of Eli, since I don't know him, but I also don't know how he treats every single person that comes in contact with him. With the level of exposure that I see on here and FB, willingness to accepts people's opinions has to exist. Otherwise I'm going to have to think that the validation post from a few months ago is actually true.
Delete*accept
DeleteI wish anonymous comments weren't allowed on this blog. And for the record I'm a different "anonymous" than the above, and the real life Eli that I met was a bit shy but very nice considering I was obsessed with him.
DeleteWaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait a minute here! Are y'all telling me that Eli is a REAL person? Like, flesh and blood? With thoughts and feelings and insecurities and triumphs and fears and loves and hates? That he (nearly) fearlessly shares to elebenty-bazillin people on this thing you kids call the "internets"?
DeleteNo. Effin. Way.
I would come here and defend Eli and talk about how amazing he is (I've been reading the blog since last year) and I'm sure his family and friends think highly of him but I also happened to meet him and for some reason expected him to be friendly but to my disappointment, that was not the case. Yet I still stop by every once in a while to see if there's something funny to read.
DeleteSue.
Anon Sue - were you opposing counsel, by any chance?
DeleteSue, was he rude? I have met him a couple of times and have a hard time imagining him being rude. Maybe just shy? What did he do that was so unfriendly? I found him to be charming and kind.
DeleteOMG!!!! ELI!!!!! You're famous enough to have haters!!!!! Things just got legit!!!!!!
Delete@awesomesauciness haha! you must have a lot of time in your hands.. that last comment was funny! I don't understand why people overreact! come on, everyone has to love and worship Eli?? as long as you're not mean or disrespectful, there is nothing wrong with telling him how you feel ESPECIALLY if you've met him - I haven't seen any comments that said anyone hated Eli; that's a bit of an exaggeration in my opinion. No one said they were ticked off, either. If they're still here it's because there's something about the blog or him that continues to attract them. I think most people would naturally expect for Eli to be friendly to them based on what and how he writes and for the fact that this blog wouldn't be as popular if it weren't for the followers that keep reading and sharing the posts. It's a reasonable assumption. But Eli is not required to be a friend to everyone so... it's his choice. I'd love to know what Eli has to say about this. :-)
DeleteI wouldn't expect Eli to be super-sweet if I met him. I mean, he makes people uncomfortable for sport and he hates the kittehs. He's practically pure evil! But he's really hilarious and quirky, and I love that. I also secretly suspect that he might be gay (not that there's anything wrong with that!) so there's the added intrigue there. And no curse words! two thumbs up.
Delete^^^^^^������
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteDid any of you care to think that this might be his friend Jolyn, that's pulling this prank? He did mention in a past post that she posts here as Anonymous all the time and makes stuff up. Duh doy.
DeleteAw your mom is purty! :)
DeleteMeow
ReplyDeleteEvery now and then the parents need to hear from the kids that they are appreciated - and every now and then the kids need to say it - it keeps things in balance... as to why I come here, it's an absurd way you have of looking at life, with the occasional sincere moment thrown in - it's getting harder and harder to find good clean fun out there and I need to say too, "Eli, you are appreciated..."
ReplyDeleteI come here because I like you: you're honest, and you're funny, and you don't seem particularly self-aggrandizing. OOOOH CHECK OUT THE VOCAB RIGHT THERE. My parents are aging-- my dad has dementia-- and as I look back, I realize that they might not have been perfect but they did their best, and they did it with love, and you really can't ask for more. Sounds like your parents are good eggs, yo.
ReplyDeleteI come here for the cookies. There are cookies, right? Tell me there are cookies. There has to be cookies. I was specifically told there would be cookies!
ReplyDeleteWhere are the cookies? No, seriously, where are the cookies??
Cookiescookiescookiescookiescookies
Or..pie.
I like pie.
Apple pie, specifically, but only if it's warm. And has cheese on top...a thin slice of sharp cheddar. With ice cream on the side, only strawberry not vanilla and if you don't have ice cream then just pie but not warm and no cheese and if you don't have either then never mind.
Okay, Sally ;)
DeleteOn the side is very big with me. :-)
DeleteSomeday there will be pie... or cookies... hopefully some kind of baked good. Not nanaimo bars though. I'm not a huge fan of those.
DeleteWhat are your feelings on gourmet doughnuts?
It depends. I like the plain cake kind of doughnuts, but only if they are fresh and either lightly glazed on top with chocolate or just plain with nothing on them and I cannot stand the Krispy Kreme kind that are, I believe, large brown balls of lard coated in sugar and more lard and they make my stomach hurt and I cannot understand why anyone would eat them.
DeleteBecause you can leave them sitting on the counter for 2 weeks and pop it the microwave for 30s. Good as new!!
DeleteSo I've been told...
I only come here in hopes that you'll post about Kurt...
ReplyDeleteI just come here because it's refreshing not to have every other word a swear and still be quite funny. I just recently started reading Stranger and wonder why I haven't found this blog earlier. *Name is Rebecca, not Anonymous*
ReplyDeleteI came because of the snuggie texts-which were hilarious!- and stayed because I realized you had some poignant things to say about life and the struggles therein (... or thereof? ). Annnnd then I found out you love Paul Simon, and that took it to a whole new level!
ReplyDeleteDitto, I came because of the Snuggie Texts, then found you live in SLC and that I probably would have loved to date you. I dated a guy just like you but then he went on a mission and asked me not to wait (I should have waited anyway =( but I'm married now so I just come to read about your crazy adventures and to read what "Strange" predicaments you get into. That and I want to see if you really hook up with any of your readers and will eventually settle down with one. (Again, already married).
Delete***Susan
I also came because of the snuggie texts... they were epic. I continue to come because the posts continue to be epic and also we're friends now... Right?
Delete@***Susan,
DeleteGirlfriend - whaaat? Are you suggesting Eli Stranger be your "bit on the side"??
No, No, No I can only handle one man at a time and sometimes they can be just as challenging as kids! No, I think Eli is cool and adventures and I'm jealous of his adventures.
Delete***Susan
Thank you for posting on my birthday. That made me happy.
ReplyDeleteI honestly don't know why I subscribe to you, you are so random and crazy. Maybe it's the random crazy that I love!! haha.
ReplyDeleteCathie is gorgeous!!
When I first saw her picture I was certain that she was the first counselor in the Relief Society General Presidency see here for the resemblance! I was wrong, her name is Carole Stephens. Both are gorgeous, though!
ReplyDeleteI found your blog for the ironman training posts. I stayed for snuggies, texts, and loved Palau. Now that you're in SLC, I'm a little afraid it won't be as much fun (I spent my childhood in SLC... I served my time and have no desire to go back :-) other than to visit family that can't let go of the place and even then I shudder a bit at the thought). But I'm staying to see how it turns out. You're a lot like one of my nephews, so can I be an honorary Aunt?
ReplyDeleteThat and you usually make me laugh. And I like cats!
<3
ReplyDeleteI'm here waiting for the inevitable return of Daniel. I love that man.
ReplyDeleteHow do I even begin to explain why I come here?!
DeleteI come here because this blog is flawless and it makes my day - every day!
Eli rocks my sox!!
(I'm also here for the inevitable return of Daniel - but that's besides the point. We all know that will eventually happen)
#TeamELI
I'm just here to keep tabs on you for the Q of C and Leotrix( he's coming for you). . . I guess I just blew my cover, I expect my eyes will now be pecked out.
ReplyDeleteI'm on here because you are hilarious, your parents sound amazingly insane, and I appreciate that I am not the only person my age that meows the lyrics to songs. BTW, I was in Salt Lake City about two months ago, and I thought of you, even though I don't know you (in a non-creepy, not- a- stalker way). Keep up the good work Eli!
ReplyDelete*drags soapbox to center stage*
ReplyDelete......and you know what, peeps? All this thinking the "Eli" here is the Eli out there (or IRL as the kids call it) is just crazy talk.
Anyone who writes a blog - for any reason - is not going to be "on" 24/7. Hell, some of us can barely be on for 1/7 much less 24.
Most bloggers are exasperatingly normal, boring, pissy, occasionally funny humans. We have bad hair days, cavities, mismatched socks (just me? allllrighty then), poor taste in men/women, strange food obsessions and so on.
In other words, we are human.
Now, I don't know Eli IRL, and he doesn't know me. I'm just speaking as a fellow blogger.
It's hard to come up with something that will make you people smile/laugh/cry/think on a regular basis. So, if you don't think it is, go write a blog for a couple of years and then we'll talk.
*picks up soapbox and walks away*
I come here to read all the comments, to see pictures of Kurt, Daniel, Eli, Cathi and Bob, and Leotrix. And get cookies. And chocolate. Dark chocolate. And for a good laugh. We all need a good laugh. And because I live in New Zealand, which is almost as far as you can get from SLC and still be on the same planet (both geographically and culturally).
ReplyDeletesue:)
Yay for New Zealand! I lived there for a while. Best place on Earth!
DeleteDude, what did you do to tick off Anonymous??
ReplyDeleteThank-you, Son. You made my day, month, year. You are my favorite son and writer. You rock my world! (Is that what the kids say these days?) ;)
ReplyDeletePS. Thanks for not posting one of my many "fat" pictures! :)
DeleteXoxoXoXOOXOoooX
DeleteIn case you wondered the XOs are from me Dot Dot Dot Cathie :) hehehe
Delete1.) Your mom is awesome. See above comments from 'dot dot dot Cathie.' :)
ReplyDelete2.) He has a name, YOU INSENSITIVE JERK! (see what I did there?)
To Eli's Mom - how wonderful to have raised a son like Eli and how thankful we are that he shares you with us!
ReplyDeleteI love this picture! We have awesome parents!
ReplyDeleteI come here mainly because wowohmygoshhowdoyougetyourhairtolooksoamazingallthetimelikeareyoumagicorsomething?!?!?!?!?!?!
ReplyDelete