Sunday, July 9, 2017

The One Day

Last year, in honor of one of the top 1,200 best lines from the cinematic classic Mean Girls, I tweeted on our nation's birthday the following:

For those unfamiliar, there's a line in Mean Girls when the protagonist's voice-over narration says that "Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."

I congratulated myself for my well-placed reference, one which was hardly noticed by my seven or so perpetually-disappointed Twitter followers who have correctly surmised by this point that I still don't really understand how Twitter works.

Then, a few weeks later, it was Pioneer Day/Tami's birthday and I realized that the joke would have been much funnier on Pioneer Day. Never one to let an opportunity to recycle a joke and then beat it to death go by, I went for it.


I legit got an angry message after I tweeted this from someone on Twitter who called me a "hack" (an accusation I don't really understand in this context; can one be a hack for stealing one's own joke?), told me I'm not funny, and also accused me of being stupid for thinking that I would get away with tweeting essentially the same joke twice.

I learned a few things from this experience: (1) people on Twitter can be very angry over really unimportant things; (2) my inability to be funny is seriously hurting other people; and (3) people on Twitter have a refreshingly-wonderful amount of time to address issues they care about.

One thing you may not know about me is that people getting irrationally angry with me about incredibly stupid things on the Internet is like one of my top 5 favorite things about life. There's this one troll that occasionally leaves comments on Stranger about how my stories are made up and how I have no friends. I stopped posting these comments some time ago because CENSORSHIP and because I didn't like that people were picking fights with each other in the comments section of Stranger on innocuous posts when they're supposed to be talking about how much they admire Tami instead. But these comments still come in and they bring me an unreasonable amount of joy. I typically screenshot them and text them out to my group of friends (the ones who aren't real, of course). On occasion they are presented in a series of dramatic readings at gatherings.

The dramatic readings usually turn into a conversation about what kind of person would take the time to read a site they seem to hate, one that blatantly admits to exaggeration, and then leave comments that accuse the writer of exaggeration. FOR YEARS.

All of this is to say, when I received the angry message about my Tweets, I decided that a line had been drawn in the sand. So for the next year:









So yeah. I'm the kind of person who is willing to tweet the same joke over and over for a full year just to annoy one person on the Internet.

I wonder where my life would be today if I applied this same dedication to things that matter.

I GUESS WE'LL NEVER KNOW.

~It Just Gets Stranger

35 comments:

  1. This is why you're my favorite person ever, you're so extra it's fantastic

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  2. I keep seeing that joke repeated and every time I laugh more. #taxday was my favorite. Father's day creeped me out a bit though...

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    1. Had the exact same reaction. What's the application process for getting in on seeing these screenshots from your fangers? (My attempt at angry/fan/stranger...) I'll work on it.

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    2. I would also like an application to start receiving these screenshots.

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    3. Agreed! My skin is too thin for me to have direct contact to angry internet posts (Meg's story about moderating gave me the willies), so I'm very grateful for your censorship. But I would love to see those posts through your filter.

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    4. I'll just settle for krishelle forwarding the screen shots on to me!!!

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    5. You got it Katie. But I would think as a top three cousin he should already be sending them to you.

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  3. The Question is, did this angry messenger actually reply back? I'd like to know his reaction.

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  4. I think we all need a blog or a video of a Dramatic Reading of some of these hateful comments. I mean, if someone has that much time and tenacity over the years to hate this Blog THAT MUCH, then, the least we can do is acknowledge all the work that has gone into letting you know about it.

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  5. I noticed the repeats. Made me chuckle every time. I love reading your tweets on the side of your blog. I'm glad you have that little widget or whatever there, because I don't actually do the Twitter thing myself.

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  6. I didn't know the source but I had reached the point where I looked for that joke on every holiday or minor holiday, just to see if it made it in. I loved it.

    You exaggerate on this site? What??? You mean...you mean...you don't have the world's greatest hair? WHAT???

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    1. Obviously there are some things I would never exaggerate. Let's not go too far.

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  7. i'm so disappointed you missed Christmas and New Year's eve. ;)

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    1. Well I already said it about Thanksgiving so it wouldn't have been true and I'm no liar.

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  8. I was just telling someone the other day that you've been tweeting this every holiday and how much I love it!

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  9. This is why I will be a forever reader/listener. I love that you can take a troll and make it work for you (and your friends).

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  10. Terrible jokes? Terrible jokes told to annoy people? Elaborate scenarios told in ridiculous fashion? Occasional goading of trolls into sulking under their bridges and neglecting their goat-harrassing duties?

    I didn't realize we had so much in common!

    But I guess that's why you're so appealing, Eli. You're such an every-man.

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  11. This is why I love Stranger. I mostly lurk, but once in a while you inspire me, Eli. I can only aspire to be as good a snarky witch as you are.

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  12. I'm honestly just excited I get to dress like a slut so often.

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  13. You missed Canada Day, July 1st...but I dressed like a slut anyway ;)

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    1. I figured you would so I didn't think I needed to remind you.

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    2. I'm hoping that Canada Day comment is from Lee in anonymous disguise.

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  14. The Stranger troll has got to be the saddest person on the internet. I'm laughing just thinking about how pissed he or she must be about the post and the fact that they can't even respond because CENSORSHIP.

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    1. The troll's very sensitive feelings already got hurt. We've received a couple of hilarious messages already. Always "Anonymous," of course. You know. Cause scared.

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    2. My favorite one curiously accused me of being a cyber bully while mocking the way I dress IN THE EXACT SAME SENTENCE.

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    3. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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    4. Ok. That is hilarious.

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    5. Based on my in depth analysis of the summation of the second-handed comment by the troll as provided by Mr. McCann, then I truly think POTUS is trolling you!

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  15. Irrational anger about silly things is seriously why I'm grateful Al Gore invented the internet.

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  16. Methinks the anonymous coward who posts that your stories are exaggerated and that you don't have friends is a boring person who is jealous that you have good friends. It's actually a sad thought (I don't mean to be patronizing when I say that). There's a very sad person out there who doesn't know how to just go live their own life in peace. May the Stranger troll learn to let go.

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  17. Have you ever thought that the person who posts that your stories are exaggerated is on the spectrum? Knowing many people with a variety of mental disabilities, it would be difficult for some people to grasp much of the humor of your blog (sarcasm, exaggeration, etc). Don't be so harsh, as you admitably don't know them. Kindness wins.

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  18. Please, Eli, for the love of sweet clothespin jeebus, dedicate an entire post to a) the troll's comments - no context, we can make up our own, and b) a dramatic reading of the best of the troll's comments.

    It will make his/her/its day, trust me on this, and we your devoted fans can collectively point and laugh and be creative.

    Just remember, he/she/it started this shit. WE are just acting as enablers.

    Also, as someone mentioned, the troll may be on the spectrum - pffft...I highly doubt it, and so do you..you know you do. Kindness may win, but where's the fun in that? ;-)

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    1. I have a theory that you are actually the troll. Or maybe it's Lee. OR MAYBE IT'S BOTH OF YOU!

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    2. WE will never tell!! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

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