Strangerville Fan Mail

Somehow it has been about eight months since Jolyn and I launched Strangerville. If our announcement of Strangerville was equivalent to conceiving a child, you would have to watch the graphic video footage of the baby's head crowning in just a few short weeks.

NOT THAT WE KNOW WHAT CONCEIVING, BABIES, HEADS, OR CROWNING MEANS!

While we are admittedly novices (with exceptional hair) at podcasting, we've ridden the learning curve with some success and are arrogantly proud of how far Strangerville has come this year. Very much of that has to do with your continued support, comments, emails, and the number of times you spend your birthday candle wishes on us.

This week on Strangerville shorts, we decided to finally go through some of the emails you have been sending us and answer them to the best of our ability. One Stranger has expressed a hope on a few occasions that Strangerville might somehow be made accessible to those with hearing impairment, something I would love to have the bandwidth for at some point. For today, I've pasted the text of the emails below, so there's at least something for you.

Enjoy!

Dear Strangerville,

I'm writing on a matter of public concern today. I am the current PTA president of the Whistledale School District, local Sunday School Teacher, scrivener for our Neighborhood Watch Program, and a PROUD mother of 9. I am also a co-founder of Mom's for Decency in Public Broadcasting. I have listened to your program throughout this year and have noted some very serious concerns regarding your content. Children are listening and you have a public responsibility to not pollute their innocent minds with insidious and pernicious obscenity. To that, as co-founder of Mom's for Decency, I hereby demand a public apology for the constant gratuitous nudity on display in your Strangerville episodes. While I'm aware that Strangerville is an audio-only podcast, I do not believe that this is an excuse for you to fill our homes with pornography. It has become clear to me from listening to each episode of Strangerville that Jolyn has recorded the episodes topless, occasionally deigning to wear pasties, at best. I have vividly imagined this each and every time I have listened to the show and have in fact sketched many pictures of what I'm envisioning and now all of these images are sitting out in my home for my NINE children to see. Please require Jolyn to cover up before your next broadcast or I will be required, morally, to report you to the FDA (The Family Decency Administration).

Diane Falanagan

Dear Strangerville,

First of all, I just want to say that I love the podcast. I think what you guys have done to fight against equestrianism is probably the most important work of our day. My name is Daryl Smiggle's and I started Smiggle's Glue Factory in 1923 in Clarifax Virginia. In recent years Equestrianism has threatened to undermine the important work we do for the glue industry. Smiggle's is proud of the work we have done for nearly a century and we have been appalled with the smear campaign equestrians have waged against us for our noble attempts to exterminate horses everywhere. Please keep up your good work.

Daryl Smiggle

Dear Strangerville,

While I love the podcast so far, I think it would be really great, in the name of feminism, if Eli and Jolyn traded places. Eli could speak in a high pitched voice and Jolyn could speak in a deep and sultry voice. I think this would inspire more girls to know that they can be whatever they want to be. If you care about equality, you will do this.

Gloria Steinem

Dear Strangerville,

I'm really enjoying the nudity on your program displayed by Jolyn. All I can say is MORE MORE MORE!

Tom Riddle

Dear Strangerville,

I wanted to write you and let you know that I LOVE your program. Captivating. Inspiring. Thrilling. Well-done from beginning to end. I could wait to find out what was going to happen with that mysterious girl. And I was so invested in Winona Ryder's passionate quest to find her son after he was captured by that monster. One question, how much did you alter or dramatize the real life story upon which you based this series?

Sincerely,

A Fan For Life

Dear Strangerville,

I purchased a gallon of black cherry pecan ice cream from your store last November. After I got it home I opened it and stuck my longest finger all the way down the middle of it and did not feel one pecan. I would like to return this gallon of ice cream for a full refund and additional store credit for the trouble. I think you could resell this ice cream if you simply use a butter knife and smooth over the finger marks. You will also need to chip off one inch of ice that has built up on the top. Otherwise the ice cream is fine. I have served it to my grandchildren for several decades despite the ice build up.

Ruth Gladstone  

~It Just Gets Stranger