Wednesday, July 1, 2020

Skylar Looks Good In Sweaters

A couple months ago I called my knitting store down the street #supportlocal #citizenoftheyear #It'sScaryToTalkOnThePhone #bravery. I had picked a new sweater to knit, something that would be the most difficult knitting project yet, besides, perhaps, The Scarf That Shall Not Be Named.

The knitting store (Blazing Needles woot woot) was shut down, just like everything else on planet Earth at that time, but they were doing phone and internet orders and then either shipping product or letting you come pick it up on their front porch.

They helped me figure out what I needed, took all of the money I've ever had in my life, and I walked over that very day.

The knitting project ended up being extremely fun to make. Skylar had picked this sweater out online and I was hesitant because I thought it was hideous but I forgot the great Skylar rule, which is that literally everything looks perfect on him and he should have to spend some time in jail for this. (Where he'd look great in an orange jumpsuit he is so infuriating.)

I finished it over the weekend and I wanted you to behold my endless talents so here you go:





Also, unrelated, here's a ridiculous picture of Skylar asleep on the couch with his three-year-old niece:


My ovaries just fell out of my body. AND I PROBABLY DON'T EVEN HAVE OVARIES.

Finally, I wrote a humor piece about visiting a very fascinating restaurant called The Mayan with my parents when I was 15. I'm quite proud of it and I would really love it if you'd all go check it out here.

~It Just Gets Stranger

9 comments:

  1. THE MAYAN. I totally forgot about that place!

    And well done on the knitting!! I'm impressed how people can weave different colors in patterns with yarn. I'm a big fan of crocheting, but I can't get my head around knitting.

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  2. Stunning!!!!!!! The man, the sweater, the niece, Duncan....all just STUNNING!! It's serving me David Rose realness over here.

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  3. I remember the Mayan being other worldly when we went while visiting Utah in my youths. Then I saw the building a few years ago and it had lost its grandeur. Also, the sweater is amazing and is giving me Ruth Bader Ginsburg vibes. Well done.

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  4. The piece on The Mayan is one of the most excellent things I have ever read. I am DYING over the men's romper.

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    1. Thank you! I wasn't sure if that joke made sense but it felt right.

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  5. I read your Mayan piece. SO MANY great one liners! Also, I had completely forgotten how desperately I wanted my parents to take me there back in middle school. My 13 year old self is so jealous you actually got to go!

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  6. Oh my word Eli I just watched The Mayan diving on YouTube. I figured you were using poetic license but no, it was even more absurd than I could imagine. My closeted childhood suddenly feels so hollow.

    Link for anyone curious: https://youtu.be/RmFED5sOhNo

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    1. Oh no. It was MAGICAL and TERRIFYING and SENSUAL and I'M RUNNING OUT OF ADJECTIVES.

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