Monday, October 14, 2013

Window Washer

The other day I was sitting in my 16th floor office, minding my own business. It was a beautiful fall day outside and I occasionally glanced a few inches above my computer monitor to enjoy the breathtaking views of the western side of the Salt Lake Valley.

Then, without any kind of warning, this immediately dropped in front of me:



I screamed.

Then I fell out of my chair.

Then I took 36 pictures of this guy.

He stared at me.

I need a game plan for next time. Something to really freak him out.

~It Just Gets Stranger

35 comments:

  1. I'm the vindow viper. I've come to vash and vipe your vindows.

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    1. That was the scariest thing EVER when I was eight!

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    2. Oh god, I used to read those books all the time when I was a kid. hahaha!

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  2. Um, so you want to freak the guy out who is hanging by a wire 16 stories up? If he falls what are you going to do? I'd say be funny or cute, but don't try to freak him out.

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    1. Does it seem to anyone else like more and more people have been commenting lately who don't seem to know what a joke is?

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  3. Checking your stranger email at work? Crop out the computer next time, stalkers can zoom in. As a stalker you should have known that!

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    1. Oh my gosh! I see my name! In your inbox! ... I'm famous!

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  4. Maybe write him a nice note and tape it to your window for him to see... you can be friends! Maybe he'll wash your window extra well. :)
    Or you could put up pictures of QofC and have him fall to his death - your choice.

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    1. I love this idea. A full window of Q of C and First Eye pictures. And maybe one Leotrix right in the middle.

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  5. Maybe show a bit of ringworm skin, just not too much. You don't want your office to think you are a whore.....or do you?

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  6. Throw a party in your office on a day you'll know he's washing your windows. Cake, balloons, petting zoo, bounce house, the works. Then he'll just be sad he wasn't invited to a cool party and had to watch from outside. Like he did in high school. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That will show him.

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  7. Get bucket and a squeegee an wash the window from the inside as he washes from the outside... try to mirror him. That would be hilarious

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  8. Point and tell him he missed a spot... ;) . Repeat.

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  9. You NEED to make a deal with the person in the office above you to warn you when the washer is headed your way...THEN, put on your best mime act and wash your windows from the inside! OR splatter the window with bits of something that makes it hard to tell if the mess is on the inside or the outside. (but maybe that's mean?)

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  10. I think you need to make it your highest priority to make this guy laugh while he's washing your window. And we need video proof. :)

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  11. I think pump up the jams on your music player of choice and dance like the window washer's watching. (better than if nobody's watching, because you have a focal point). Point at him and shake what Cathy gave ya.

    Alternately, you can get a plant that's ALMOST as big as you, and hide behind it right in the middle of the room whilst he washes the windows. Peek around/through the bush, and run between it and your desk/random other furniture being all James Bond.

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  12. Show him your inner cat. We all know it's there, very near the surface, waiting to let loose.

    Just an idea...

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  13. Are you sure it wasn't Kurt? maybe that was what he was practising when you saw him on the building the other day...

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  14. Sit at your desk completely naked and act like nothing is up.

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  15. My husband is a high rise window washer. He has seen some freaky stuff and...disgustingly, been invited to join in - from drunk nude women to 3somes..... I am fortunate I have a man with a high moral compass who loves his wife and kids. The only thing he DOES do is accept home cooked food from an older Greek woman..and tells me in great detail how delicious it was, as he hung outside her window, LOL!
    As far as what you can do....well, the day does get tiring, so while I wouldn't advise scaring him (please, he may have a wife and kids at home) maybe something funny to lift his spirits, if you cannot open your window and offer him Greek food..

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    1. I meant to say, he ate her food as he hung outside her window, and then LATER he told me about it...no phone calls that high!

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  16. You should get someone else to come into your office and pretend to murder you. That would totally freak him out!

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  17. In Russia, we no get window men washers. Some say Kremlin forbid it when many secrets found out by washer who name is Vlad. Vlad was my cousin of my mother through brother. We no hear from Vlad. Perhaps he come to America and now washes your window, yes? If it be Vlad, next time show him picture of woman with hairy chest (no booby shot). Vlad gets much laughter from hairy chest women.

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  18. Glad to see I'm not the only one checking gmail at work.

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  19. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  20. Oh my gosh this happened to me about a month ago! I swear it seemed like the guy jumped from the sky and slammed into my window! Talk about heart attack. I fell out of my chair and spilled my soda! And I swear the guy laughed!!

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  21. Who took my baseball?

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