Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Jolyn is a Kindergarten Teacher


Jolyn is a kindergarten teacher, which means she is responsible for our children. 

This is not a drill, people. Jolyn Metro is responsible for America's children. Can you imagine what April Fool's Day is going to look like twenty years from now?

I can. Rivers of blood and cities on fire. I mean, it will be entertaining, but horrifying.

Jolyn is involved in some kind of competition to win grant money for classroom supplies. Apparently you can vote infinity times throughout October and if she gets the most votes, she can secure the grant. You can quit your jobs, find a cat babysitter, and spend the next four weeks voting for her here.

Jolyn is really good at what she does. At least, I assume so. I've been in the homes of a few of her students and these families each had what appeared to be a religious shrine taking up an entire room, totally dedicated to her. I don't know whether this makes me respect or fear her, but I do know that it means she has made an impact on America's children. Even Casper.

I've also seen Jolyn interact with children on a number of occasions. She's like the child whisperer. She immediately won over my niece Emrie, the one with whom I've been trying to develop a non-hostile relationship for half a decade. This happened when we interviewed Emrie for our second episode of Strangerville. During the course of this interview, the two discussed my age (which Emrie suggested was 52), my hair (which Emrie explained was ugly because it was "bumpy and to the side"), and who Emrie's favorite uncle is (spoiler alert, not me). 

In summary, Jolyn ruins lives (mine) and she saves lives (the children of American). And I just love her. And fear her. And I love that I fear her.

That's all I really have to say today.

~It Just Gets Stranger

22 comments:

  1. Hi Eli,
    I just voted for Jolyn. Can you please pin this or post it every day? I'm getting old and need the reminder.

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  2. It's so sad that schools don't have budgets sufficient to keep a teacher's room supplied adequately. I know so many teachers (who aren't well paid to begin with) who have to purchase their own supplies that the school district should be providing. A high school teacher I know, had to use a "go fund me" page to be able to buy copies of "A Tale of Two Cities" for his students. What a shame. My vote has been cast for Jolyn. Best of luck to her!!!

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  3. I voted! I hope she wins!

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  4. I'm going to assume you dropped that Casper reference in there just for me. I appreciate that. Poor Casper.

    And today's vote has been cast. For Casper.

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    Replies
    1. I swear to you when I wrote his name I thought, "I haven't heard kjax say 'poor Casper' in a while."

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    2. We have that special middle-child bond.

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  5. I can no longer hear (or read) "rivers of blood" without seeing the images from this event: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/sep/14/rivers-of-blood-dhaka-bangladesh-eid-animal-sacrifices?0p19G=c

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  6. Done, I'll do my best to remember daily. Good luck to her! I'm a kindergarten teacher too, but I, fortunately, only have 11 kiddos of craziness.

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    Replies
    1. You only have 11??!?! Dude, dude.

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    2. I know! However, I do work at a private Christian school that is kind of in the middle of nowhere, so class sizes aren't usually huge.

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  7. Want to hear something crazy? Jolyn was my best friend's daughter's teacher. And yes, I can attest that they LOVE Jolyn.

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  8. Is Jolyn winning? Because we (I) need updates!

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    Replies
    1. She said she doesn't get voting updates so we won't know until the end of the month!

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    2. I think the order they come up on the main page is the order they are in for voting. It makes sense in my mind because Jolyn was pretty high but is slowly dropping.

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  9. Voted! It was always my dream to be a teacher and although that didn't happen for me, I'm happy to support other teachers!

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  10. I just voted. I was in education for 42 years. My last 15 years I was a technology integration specialist. I know how hard it is to get tech into classrooms, especially for younger students. And, I know how hard it is to get grants for classrooms. Twenty-eight K kids? That is NUTS! I know you can find wonderful apps, and even do some of your own story-telling/reading for them so you can work one on one with others. I hope you have some good volunteers. I'd love to help but I live across the country. :-( Good luck! I hope you win!

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  11. I was also going to home-school my son as well, but we were very lucky to have found this Phoenix pre-k and would recommend it to anyone looking for a great preschool.

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  12. Sounds good. So glad for her. I am not a professional teacher but have just started homeschool for my kids. Learning best methods to teach them in best way possible. http://www.kidsfront.com/english/can_modals.html has come up as the best website for y help regarding it.

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