Tuesday, March 3, 2020

Coronapox

[Strangerville Live is on Friday! Get your tickets! It shall be a good time! Click HERE.]

Eli: Did you hear we have to start washing our hands?

Skylar: Uh . . .

Eli: Yeah. There's like a super contagious disease going around right now so we have to wash our hands after we touch stuff like the bathroom door handle and payphones.

Skylar: Are you . . . using payphones?

Eli: You really need to educate yourself. This thing is bad. We really have to start washing our hands.

Skylar: No, I'm aware of the Corona Virus. But I'm concerned about the word "start"--

Eli: And coughing and stuff. Like, you have to be extra careful not to cough on people right now because there's like a 50% chance of dying if you catch this.

Skylar: Well, no. Actually--

Eli: It's basically worse than Ebola. And Smallpox. And tetanus.

Skylar: Definitely not true.

Eli: It's not worse than tetanus or diabetes?

Skylar: Wait, do you think diabetes is contag--

Eli: I can't believe this is all happening on the week I've decided to do a juice cleanse.

Skylar: You do realize you're eating a block of cheese right now.

Eli: Do you think my juice cleanse will make me more or less likely to catch Coronapox?

Skylar: Where do I even start with answering this question . . .

Eli: I kind of want to make brownies but I'm worried that would completely undermine all of the benefits of my juice cleanse.

Skylar: Well, I guess you could just eat the batter. That's basically brownie juice.

Eli: OMG you are a genius and my soulmate.

Skylar: I was completely mocking you and not at all proposing that seriously.,

Eli: Well you better stop mocking me or I won't give you any of these brownies.

Skylar: No! I'm sorry!

Eli: Fine. You can have some. But only if you wash your hands. Apparently we have to start doing that now.

Coronapox

~It Just Gets Stranger

11 comments:

  1. My daughter and I are coming to SL! But, what if we catch the Corona Virus while we're there? Do we get a lifetime supply of snuggies? Apparently you quickly die of the virus so that would only be like 1 snuggie apiece. Between my daughter and me that's 2 whole snuggies! So I guess I'd be crazy NOT to catch the virus there!

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    1. I want snuggies! We deserve snuggies! (Sick of being sick in Belarus)

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    2. The good thing about Snuggies is their warranty is 200 years so one should last you for several generations.

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  2. Is that all we are missing?
    Because, seriously, I am tired of the coronpox in our house!
    Good to know...such a service you provide!

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  3. Oh how I've missed conversation posts.

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  4. I'm officially starting a brownie batter juice cleanse today! Thanks Skylar!!

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  5. Does this mean cookie dough is a pulpy cookie juice??? Yay!

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    Replies
    1. I just quoted you in a No Context Quote of the day group on FB. This is awesome.

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  6. OMG! I have missed the conversation banter!

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